Mike has been asking all of our friends what they are doing for mother's day, which mother's house to they go to (we always debate if we go see his mom or my mom). He was surprised that not many of them travel to see their mothers. I kindly reminded him that they don't have to go anywhere to celebrate, they can stay home because they are the mothers, they are the ones celebrated. It took him a moment, but he got it.
I know I have a lot to be thankful for, and I know there are a lot of people out there who also suffer during Mothers Day. Maybe they recently lost their mother. Maybe they've lost a child. Maybe they had a horrible mother. Maybe they never had a mother at all. I know I am not the only one who can't muster up the strength to go to church on Mothers Day. Church is hard enough as it is. My prayers are with all of these other people today who are hurting. There are a lot out there. So all the happy mothers can go to church and we pray that maybe for 5 minutes they too will think about all of those that are hurting.
I don't really have any profound words for mother's day, so I am adding some links to others that have already done a beautiful job of it.
Here is one quote that I came across in response to a blog I read a quite a while back. I like that it is from the perspective of someone who has gone on to have children, how IF is still hard, even after all these years. The pain of it never truly goes away.
"I am one of those women who for years avoided church on Mother’s Day. It’s a painful day on many levels. We have children in heaven that we miss dearly. My mother passed away 6 years ago on Mother’s Day and I miss her terribly. These are wounds that are re-opened every year on this day. But most painful of all are the years of Mother’s Day celebrations when I longed to be a mother & was unable. The pain of infertility is unlike any loss or grief I have ever known. And even though I left the world of the infertile almost 18 years ago, that pain is still with me and runs very deep. It’s a grief and loss that is all the more painful because it’s not acknowledged or validated. There’s no casket, no time for mourning, no sympathy cards. Yet month after month, year after tedious year, the hope and longing to be a mother just keeps growing. And month after month the infertile woman faces the silent death of her most precious dream, all the while those around her celebrate the fulfillment of theirs.
Thank you for your sensitivity to women who grieve on Mother’s Day for so many reasons."
This was also an encouraging blog to me http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/Infertility_on_Mothers_Day
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